Hurt people MUST Heal....

My time in Huntsville has finally come to an end. It’s been filled with lots of lessons and above all Patience. I’ve wanted to jump the gun on many occasions and leave but a block was placed each time until NOW. I couldn’t appreciate the blocks when they were there but now..... Whew! I’m better because I had to pick them up and learn the lesson while removing the sting of being here.

This morning as I’ve read through 4 years worth of blogs, I can honestly say I had to come thru Huntsville. In my early 30’s, I dated someone from here. I even intended to move here at some point. Who knew life ( GOD) already knew I’d come thru this place and it would NOT be with Mr. September!

As I reflected on life and my growth, I’m thankful for each person I’ve encountered. I’m thankful for the relationships that have truly lasted a lifetime and I’m even thankful for the ones that have been brief, for there was a lesson more than anything else.

I must say, while in HSV I’ve encountered a lot of hurt and broken people. Just recently, I was told of a conversation that was had about me. I’m sure it was meant to break me but it truly made me laugh and work harder towards my exit plan.

I believe we have to hear things in order to process how people truly feel about us. I’ve been called many things but to hear “ you ain’t shyt” was low....Whew that’s an all time low. And while I could’ve chose to blog about many things, I just want to end the year on this note.

It’s okay to seek HELP! There are so many people who are walking around bleeding out on others because they haven’t found ways to stop their own bleeding. In turn, they lash out hurtful and insensitive words because that’s all they know. They respond with hurt because they’ve been hurt.
They’re negative and even a bit selfish... if nothing else, I’ve learned now more than ever; we cannot carry the hurt and baggage of others. And if we continue to stay in that type of environment we’ll conform.

I like a good Challenge. So my lovies here goes,
I challenge each of you finish 2019 with dropping baggage that isn’t yours. Drop words curses, remove friendships/ relationships that are toxic, leave dead end jobs that will not produce growth and LOVE YOURself like only you can.

Life happens extremely fast. Do not let another 10 years pass and you’re  still in the same cycle. BREAK it! Only you can change what you do not like and only you can decide when enough is enough!

If you don’t know, you now do!

ChenekaT the Blogger is back!

I’ve laid low for a while to rebuild, refocus, rest and renew. Sometimes we have to be strong enough to admit we need a little help but we also have to know when we’ve gotten all we can and it’s time to STAND again!

It’s Wednesday and guys we’ve made it. You’re better than anything that’s trying to hurt you and tear you down! Believe it!!!

Take time to heal... and in healing it doesn’t always mean making old relationships new again. To heal  means to pull off the band aids and let fresh air hit the wound. If we keep covering it up, we’re not breathing thru it. We’re not acknowledging it. We’re aware but we haven’t tackled it.

Fight thru for your happiness and work even harder to heal your hurt. You’re no good to anyone if you’re 1st no good to yourself!

Thanks everyone who has been on this 2 year journey with me while in HSV. It’s time for me to get back to living!!

Sincerely,
The Blogging Queen,
ChenekaT

Just Slow Down......

I cannot even begin to tell you how excited I was when I first moved to Atlanta. I was going to take this big City on like nobody's business. I had so much to prove. I had to prove I was good enough, I wasn't going to fail AND that I could make it.

Fast forward to today. As I sat and took time to reflect, I'm so thankful that after I realized I had nothing to prove to anyone, life became simpler and easier. Once I realized the only people I had to prove anything to was God my father ( and all I really have to do is Love & serve him) and my children, everything that was supposed to happen started to happen.

Yes, I took a few " L's" but they were just setting me up for the ultimate Wins.

I will celebrate 8 years in Georgia( Lord's willing) this November. 8 is the number of new beginnings. I've declared this year's mantra " I will not lose & Whatever is meant for me will not pass me by". I believe that with every ounce of life in me. Our lives are not a race. It doesn't matter when you arrive to the finish line, it just matters that you don't give up in the process and that you make it.

I wanted to be the 1st in my family to do a lot of things but as I lived and became a mother, other things became important and I realized that it IS important that I become my children's 1st.

I challenge you to stop and take your time. You want to build an empire? You can, there's no rush. Rome wasn't built in a day and neither was the world. God took his time forming each and every creature. He took his time forming the sun, moon and stars. He even took time to rest. So when your body speaks, take heed and listen.

As quick as I want to be done and live a quiet married life some where with my amazing husband, I have to first build, date and marry. Can't get to the end result without working the middle.

I challenge you to work the middle, work your right now. Don't give up, slow down, make adjustments, make changes, become your best YOU.

Don't rush to just get done, you'll miss the lessons and strength you'll need in between.

Signed,
Simply Living, Simply Learning, Simply Cheneka

All things aren't DEAD

There's a patch of grass on the side of our house. I've watched it over the course of a soon to be year this summer. It's gone from a beautiful green that I've mowed, to a burnt state. Over the last few weeks, weather in Georgia has been a bit cold. For this thick boned Northern girl to feel cold, it definitely must be cold. Oops, focus Cheneka ( I digress)... Lol


Each morning while walking my son to the bus stop, I always glance at the grass. It didn't start growing and turning green over night. It was a process.

Woe is life, the never ending growth process.
Some days you will feel you're at the peak of your game and some days you'll feel like you're losing. I've deemed this year as, " I will not lose" and " Whatever is meant for me will NOT pass me by". Just like the grass, daily we grow. Some days our growth is visible and some days, its internal growth.

Some days, our growth isn't for the world to see. Somethings we need to process and go through without the crowd. I've learned this and processed it the hard way. Hard lessons yield the most amazing growth. Take those lessons and allow them to grow you.  The tears you shed they truly water the soul.

I know we face situations and sometimes we feel that all hope is gone. Or even, were holding onto dead people and dead situations. I've learned to let it be and fall where it may. Sometimes, we have to walk away and let it die. If it's meant, there'll always be an opportunity for it to grow again. We cannot rush the process, it must happen on its own.

I challenge you to Grow. Grow in all areas of your life. When you least expect it, a situation that you felt was dead will re-surface. Because you stepped away from it, you allowed yourself the space to heal and grow. Because you took the time to work on you, you can now either work on the situation or experience closure.

Either way, allow yourself the space to grow. We're never to old and we never stop growing. It's an never ending process.. To grow!!!

Signed,
Sincerely Enjoying the growth process!!

Simply Put, Simply Cheneka

Sometimes!!

I have attempted to blog everyday since Friday.  I know, just plain SAD,,,
In my heart I had so much to say, each title had life but my mind and body reminded me that, " Gitl, you gotta work so you must rest". I'm sure each of you can attest to just having a lot to do. That has been my life these last few weeks. My Assistant on me like " Cheneka, check your email", my Accountability sister reminding me to take it easy but get stuff done, my business/ Women's org partner reminding me we have work to do, my children and my undying commitment to them and above all: my Father reminding me, " what's meant for you will not pass you by, WORK Cheneka"!!

I made up in my mind that I'm not losing this year but in the process I must pace myself, not take on more than I can handle because easy does it.

Whew! We need those reminders from time to time. As women, we sometimes think we must carry the world on our shoulders. We don't have too.

This weekend was a reminder for me that, it's okay to utilize the people I consider my village AND allow the other parentals to do they're part.

Just because I've carried many loads on my own, that's not the way God would have it be. And I, Cheneka need to understand this load isn't mine to bare alone. And I release, I release various fears I've carried, worries and my new mindset is let everything else go. My mantra and mirrors in my house remind me daily, " I will not lose and what's meant for me will not pass me by".

In a few weeks, I'll turn 30 for the 8th time. 30 again, lol
I kid, I'm happily embracing 38! There are people who did not and some who will not make it. If it's

God's will ( and wholeheartedly I believe it is) I will wake up wiser, stronger, more determined and cuter on 2/16. 2017 came in so nice, calm and well thought out for me.

No losing and no settling this year. I'm here for the risks, I'm here for the adventures, I'm here for the challenges and more I importantly I'm here. I'm here to be me, unapologetically and freely me...

Simply Put,
Simply Cheneka

But who are YOU anyway....

Last week, I witnessed an acquaintance suffer with mistaken identity.. The sad thing is, in no way did he resemble the actual culprit. It has bothered me for a number or reasons. 

He's a black man and our men suffer enough and two, he now has to explain to others that it wasn't him. This could cause problems for him in the workplace and in his home life. People are so insensitive at times. 

As I pondered on this blog, my mind took a trip down memory lane and I looked at some of my old blogs. I've always considered myself to be a great writer but that "trip" proved a point to me. I'm not the writer I once was. And to attempt to identify myself with the old Blogger, would do me no justice. 

I've grown, matured, lived a little, witnessed a lot and it has molded me into who I'm becoming. My yesterday's identity has nothing on who I become daily. 

The thing about our identity is, as we become more of who God has created us to be, we lose and shed what other's have perceived us to be. 

Learning and becoming my true self has been an amazing journey. I've found my Strength, my Peace. I no longer worry or care about other's thoughts or what they consider to be who I am. Honestly speaking, you can't tell me who I am because I'm evolving DAILY... Whew! We change daily. 

And while we can never change our genetic makeup, birth DNA; we can changed ourselves physically, emotionally and mentally. 

Today my loves, embrace the True you. Only YOU know who and what matters to you. YOU know your truths and your untruths. You know your plans for the future and you know the road you plan to take( unless God throws in a monkey wrench, He's Good for that lol). Live and embrace you. I mean it's YOUR identity at stake.. Be you, be True!! 

Signed, 

Simply Cheneka".... Have I changed so drastically and you've remained the same"... Tamia( Stranger in my House)... 

Patience

Well, today is Monday! If you follow my personal IG account ( neka_th), I tested your patience and sent you to my Blog IG!! Well, here goes!! 

Yesterday, after a much needed nap, I was ready to enjoy the rest of our Sunday afternoon. My son goes to an amazing PreSchool. Very community and family oriented. They have a partnership with our local Publix( supermarket) and they deliver baked goods twice a week. Matthew enjoys taking the bread but we rarely eat it. Sighhh 

So, I came up with the grand idea to feed the ducks. He was extremely excited.  Our first attempt was Roswell Recreational Park. He walked the trail, even saw water but no ducks. He played for a little while then we left. He kept saying, "Mommy we have bread in the car but we haven't fed any ducks". I responded, "I promise son, I'm going to find the ducks". 

We then drove to Riverside Park. I knew there would be ducks there. We parked and began the search for ducks. We walked the entire park and along the trail of the Chattahoochee River. We FOUND the ducks but they were on the opposite side of the River. A guy passed us and heard us talking. He told us the path to take to reach the other side. We hit the path. In the process, we stumbled upon a sacred garden. We walked thru the garden and I felt God's presence. We read the names on the different statues and my daughter said, "Mommy I feel like we shouldn't be walking on this ground because it's Holy". 

We were soon saddened. Once we reached the bank we could no longer see the ducks. By this time, the kids were over it and they just wanted to play at the park. I told them it was ok and to enjoy the park. However, I just couldn't shake not finding the ducks. So I began walking AGAIN! I was determined to feed the ducks!! I walked along the wooden path and as I reached the end, I looked down and the ducks were there!! Right there!! Finally! I tired calling my daughter's phone but she didn't answer. In solace, peace and quiet I fed the ducks ALONE!! It was in that moment I heard God's voice. "It's ok to go after ME alone", "it's okay to have patience", "I got you and you're going to have everything I promised you"... Trust ME!! 

Wow, God hasn't forgotten me!! 

As of late, everywhere I look I see God. I see/ hear him clearer than I ever have in all of my 37 years of life. I'm understanding what it is to trust him and believe him. 

My Lovies, I challenge you to continue having patience. Continue to seek what you know to be true and watch God make a way.. Patience is key!! 

As I returned to my children, I showed them the pics. Boy was son upset. He wanted to run back to the river and see them but they were already gone!! Don't miss your opportunity by being to fast. The best things in life take time.. And as always, I will patiently WAIT!! 

Signed, 

Simply Cheneka... ~ they that wait, shall inherit the desires of their heart~ CTH 

Divine Connections~

...~When you stop basing your connections on who should be here and appreciate who is here, there you'll find your Strength~ CTH

I've been on my journey for quite sometime now. I've come to the realization, God will lessen the load if I tap into what it is HE would have me to do. I've tried to alter my life and just when I thought it was working, God reminded me what I've prayed( and still pray) what He's promised, what He's shown me and what he'll do once I let HIM be God.. The funny thing is, it's not that hard to let him lead, to bad it's taken me this long to realize it. 

For the last 2 weeks, God has been talking to me the same way I'm typing this blog. I'm no longer trying to talk my way out of it, I'm listening through it. And in the process, amazing people are guiding me along the way. 

I've always believed that family will never let you down, they'll be there indefinitely. I've had to learn a lesson or 2 about that. And in the process, I've made some divine connections, that I'll carry with me forever. I have only 1 biological mother( Mama I love you) but as of late, great women who are old enough to MA have reassured me that they support me and have the interest of me AND my children at heart. 

Friends also come a dime a dozen but oh when they turn family and they pray for you, cover you, cry with you, get you together and still love you?! That's nothing but divine. 

And JESUS!!! Whew!! If we take our eyes of religion and focus on him, He's everywhere and visible in all things!! Today I'm choosing to allow these divine connections to Bless my Life, I'm choosing to let God be God and I'm choosing to keep sifting through until my treasure is visible.. Yes, I am the treasure but there's a hidden treasure growing inside of me and you too. 

My Lovies, I challenge you to stand still and see the Glory!! It's there. Allow God's grace to carry you, trust  what he's shown you IS coming to past... This Time!! 

Signed, 

Simply Cheneka ~I'm no Saint but a Sinner who's alive because of Mercy & Grace!! 

Life...

Today was a good day. I was a bit apprehensive but with all things, go in with no expectations and it'll all work out. 

I started my new job. The funny thing, I was nervous as hell but I didn't tell a soul. I mean I'm Cheneka, Cheneka is never ever nervous. LASTNIGHT as I prepared, I changed my outfit like 6 times, worried about lunch( I was starving by 12, I only packed a grapefruit, water and chewy bar), almost cried because I knew I would miss my daughter's award ceremony( how does it work when you 6th grader comforts you about missing HER ceremony, which by the way she exceeded my expectations but hey she's a branch of ME), stressed over my hours( whether I'd make it to Roswell in time to pick up my son) worried about my workload, school and my business... ( which by the way, S/O to my Women's Org Partner LB, for holding KISS down).

But I remembered where the Bible says, "be anxious for nothing but in everything by prayer and supplication, with Thanksgiving, let YOUR request be made known", Phil 4:6.. I wrote in my prayer journal, made my request known, commanded my day; Power, Love, Grace, Glory & Peace surround me and closed my eyes. 

There's nothing more rewarding that doing what you love. My entire career has consisted of service.. Service to families, babies, mothers, fathers, youth and the community. For the last 20 plus years, I've given of myself to help others and today was just the beginning of a new extension of service. 

I keep reminding myself, "You're here for this", in my Spiritual Life, Personal Life,Business  Life.. I'm Here For This.. 

My Lovies, I challenge you to find your niche and work it/ serve it/ be it/ live it. 

Do it so well that, they'll know it's you before they see your face. I'm excited for this new opportunity, new doors, new gRace and new families. Today, I became.. 

Signed, 

Simply Cheneka

My Love...

...and if you threw a party, you invited everyone you knew. You would see, the biggest gift would be from me and the card attached would say, Thank You for being a FRIEND... ~Golden Girls 

I promise I want to grow old with my best friend Moneka Mashaè( I'm Cheneka Trenè, creepy lol). I've lost count of the years, I know it's 20plus. When we 1st met, it was not peaches -n-cream. More like oil and water. But as time progressed, we grew to love and appreciate each other. 

Although we've always been in different states, it's never caused any issues. 

The last few months have been a bit trying for the both of us. I must admit it has strengthened our friendship on a whole new level. I've always prayed for her and covered her but to actually pray with her during some dark times solidified that we didn't become friends just because. She is my sister, my kids' Aunti. She's my ROD( to the fullest). 

We've been pushing each other out of our comfort zones for the last 2 months. We've agreed to become each other's  accountability partners as well. 

It's evident that in this life, we all need that one person ( or 2 or 3) we can count on when there's no 1 else. 

We've both had a few petitions before God. I've been battling with continuing my business, education and job. She's been battling with her job. We both gave each other deadlines and I'm proud to say that as of today, we both have new jobs, my business will continue to flourish and I'm going to kick school's butt! With her, I've found strength and a new level of appreciation of her and our friendship. 

My Lovies, I challenge you to take a moment and let your closest know how much you truly appreciate them. I'm blessed beyond measure to have her and a few others who show me daily that they have my back. I pray that I'll continue to always have each of them around... 

Signed, 

Simply Grateful Cheneka 

My MoodaPie..

When your little girl is no longer a little girl.. Sighhh 

My daughter traveled over the holiday break to our hometown to spend time with her father and his family. I'm always ok with her going, I'm just never prepared for the length of time. ( Long distance Co-Parenting blogs soon coming)- she returned Sunday and it felt like it had been an eternity. Yes, I talked to her daily, face timed daily but it wasn't the same as having her right within my touch. 

I try not to tell her this but she's my little best friend some days. I look to her to find the strength to keep being great because ( although my son is watching) she's actively watching and taking notes. 

I'm always amazed at how mature she's becoming but the conversations we've had since her return have seriously blown my mind. I'm always plucking her brain. ----> I digress: Yesterday, I had a friend to ask why was I interrogating him and it made me later think. Was I? But it's really just my human nature. To properly communicate, we must ask questions and because I'm A parent, I sometimes find myself using those techniques more than I should. 

Anyhoo, the more I talk to my daughter, I realize that she's like me but better. She has the potential to be better because I refuse to settle for anything less from her. I was worried with raising her without her father being in close proximity but I'm realizing we're doing fine. We have a village and although it's made of mostly women, I have awesome men as well who look out and who are genuinely concerned for both Li and Matthew( it does not replace her father but it eases my mind). 

I'm preparing to go back to school and as we talked about how our lives will change just a little, she reminded me, "Mommy I have your back and I'm so extremely proud of you". She also said, " I'm going to stay on you about getting your homework done and I'll keep Matthew quiet while you study". My heart was full. 

I also understand that sometimes, she's an ear hustler! Lol but it's ok because it keeps me on my toes with monitoring my conversations when she is in my presence. I try my best to live my life the same in front of her and behind closed doors, it's the only way. She said to me yesterday, "Mommy you are my best friend. I get it, you're my mom and you don't want to be my friend but sometimes I have so much fun with you". Just talking about her and watching her mature brings tears because there's been times where I wanted to give up but her love for me kept me going. 

Our 1st year in Georgia was hard. We moved twice within our 1st year. I never really talk about it but I questioned my move my 1st year. It was just the 2 of us literally. I didn't work the 1st 6months by choice. Once I started working and meeting ppl the load became lighter and I now know, it strengthened us and grew me up. 

Oh my babygirl Li, who will turn 12 in about 2months, I thank God for your life. I'm thankful that I get to look at you and watch you grow. Sometimes, I cannot believe how much you've grown since we moved to Georgia. My little girl who's now taller than me. I Love you my little Mooda Pie and although I'll never openly admit it, you're my best friend too. 

Signed, 

Simply Your Mom ❣❣❣

Don't just clean the Outside...

Owning a vehicle isn't always what it's cracked up to be.. But if you want it to run poroperly, maintenance is a plus. I spent a little time at Meineke this am. I was scheduled for an oil change but I ended up needing a little more done( wasn't in the budget but where there's a will there's a way). 

After leaving, it hit me that my truck hadn't been cleaned outside nor inside since Thanksgiving. There's a $4 express car wash in my neighborhood so I stopped. Can I tell you if felt good taking care of my truck. As I went through the wash, I heard my Aunt Tric'e's voice. "You just can't clean the exterior, you have to clean the interior." I thought of my life. At one point in my life, I looked together on the outside but on the inside I was dying and dirty. I was carrying so much stuff. Some was mine and some belonged to others. They left unwanted deposits with me. 

As I began to work on my inside, it changes the appearance of my outside to match what was taking place. 

I found my happy, I found Joy. I started smiling more and I even lost some unwanted weight. 

My Lovies, as we approach the end of 2015, let's find time to clean up inside and outside. What you carry on the inside will pour outside. Be carriers of Peace, Love and Happiness. It will change your life and soon it will become your way of living. 

Today, I'm not only driving a clean truck on the outside but the inside is clean too( until the boy finds his way inside).. 

Signed, 

Simply Cheneka 

I'm in Love...

Oh yes I am! In love with the concept of building a life that I love.. 

Took quite a few bumps, detours and start overs but I finally get it, I got it and now I'm good. 

My first shot at being a business owner has been an amazing success. I knew my idea would work but who knew for 4 years my service would remain in demand? I'm forever grateful to my clients and staff for trusting me and riding the waves. 

As 2015 comes to and end, I'm beyond excited for all the new things I'm allowing myself to build upon. When you love someone or something, you'll go to the ends of the earth to make it work. These size 7.5s have taken me far in 2015 and in 2016 we will continue to trod the distance. 

I've found out that waking up happy every single morning sets the tone and the atmosphere for my day. Life is looking up. I'm not only building a life that I love but I'm building a life for my children to love. It's exciting yet scary but I'm

Here for it. 

Love Life: it's going to happen. I believe it, trust it and I'm excited.. 

Physical Life: I'm going to continue working hard at being aware of my body and tuned into my need to be healthy and fit( on my terms). 

Parental Life: I'm looking forward to watching my children grown and become who they are destined to be. 

Spiritual Life: God hasn't left me, he won't leave me and as long as I stay receptive he's going to keep guiding me.. 

Financial Life: the more I invest in MY dreams and MY education, the rewards will be priceless. 

My Lovies, your declarations may be different than mine but if you start making them now and setting your self up for greatness, you will not fail. 

My heart is still full. For once I see everything coming full circle and I'm loving all that I see.. Stay tuned, only up from here!! 

Signed, 

Simply Cheneka 

Silence

I Always had something to say until I finally realized that what I think ain't worth 2 pennies when it comes to someone's life and their truths. I can go back and forth with words until I'm blue in the face and ultimately, no 1 will win... 

We live in a very judgemental world. Until we learn to keep comments to ourselves, we will find ourselves continuously battling.. 

People will have something to say whether your life is together or whether it's falling apart. In our hands lies the ability to invite them in or to keep on living.I strive for today to be better than yesterday. 

I strive to work harder, love harder and to listen to listen. Sometimes our silence is appreciated more than a response. When we listen or read to respond, we miss the point. 

I've been feeling a little out of my element for a few weeks. Not necessarily good nor bad but just a frayed. And I was reminded Sunday that, life begans to feel uncomfortable as it shifts. So, I've began to practice making moves in silence. Yes, I have a few that I share my inner fears with but for the most part, I'm figuring it out without saying much.

My loves, I challenge you to live a good & fulfilled life. Who cares if you're being judged? Who cares if nobody understands? It's not for everyone but it's for YOU to understand. Sometimes the best lives lived are the ones that are lived in silence. We don't need an audience present for everything. Live and let live! 

Signed, 

I Ain't Said a Word.... #CatchIt

Adult vs Adult...

Is it ok for me to be absolutely, positively over being an adult? Well I am. I truly understand that we put ourselves into a lot of situations but sometimes being an adult is just overRated.. 

I remember growing up, one of the many lessons I learned over and over again was, " if you have nothing nice to say DO NOT say anything at all".. I've been guilty of saying a lot of things but maturity is teaching me to speak from a place of MY truths. 

Adults can be so tough on each other and what it boils down to is simply "misunderstandings", misconstrued words and the battle of not wanting to be wrong.. 

So tonight at this moment, I denounce my adult thrown.. I don't want it.. I return it to the Gawds of growing up.. Take it back!! Lol

But seriously, all jokes aside. We have to find better ways of getting along and expressing our feelings without beating the other up with name calling. 

I get it some of us may be tough but at the end of the day words hurt.. 

I challenge all of my adult friends ( because we're all grown), to respect the next person. Simple. As. That! 

Rest Peacefully, 

Signed, 

An Adult 

That's Her.....

I'm such an Apple Girl.. Yesterday my BF sent me a few things that required me to pull up my laptop.. It's felt so foreign to me, not to mention that it's so big. None the less, I have about a gazillion pictures downloaded into my computer. Yesterday as I sat there, pictures went across the screen and this one in particular popped up. I don't know why I screen shot it but I'm glad I did... 

As I continue on my 30 day journey( on day 6), I've been praying that I truly find out who's for me, who's against me and that I embrace the true Me. 

As I looked at that picture, I remember exactly where I was and what I was thinking. Today, I didn't like the woman who was in that picture. I was in a situation that wasnt ideal. I was just settling and going thru the motions. I was hurting but smiling on the outside... 

As I prayed and evaluated where I am, yup I like me today.. Lol I'm learning to be my own girl.. If I can be my own girl, I know eventually I can be someone else's girl and in time his wife.. No more situations just to be in a situation.. No more going with the flow just because.. As my eyes are opened daily and the realCheneka  emerge, I'm

Quite please with who I am.. I'm still shedding and I'm far from perfect but I'm not who I once was!! Yup, I like me but I have 24 days left to completely LOVE me!! 

Signed, 

She's Aightttt.. 

To Know Me.... You'd know..

As I'm continuing on my 30day journey, different areas of my life are being healed.. I've always taken pride in who I am but I'm amazed at who I am becoming. I'm appreciating Cheneka. Sunday while in service, my Pastor, Bishop Murphy asked us to hug 3 people and to repeat a mini blessing/ prayer. 

As I hugged the people placed in my area, someone said to me, ( I'm

Somewhat paraphrasing)," Can you ever be serious"? In the moment I laughed it off but it has stuck with me up until this moment. And not because I was offended( by absolutely NO means) but because while I'm on my 30 day cleanse, I'm reminded of all the times I was always super serious. As I live in this moment, day to day one of my self given tasks has been to smile and appreciate life MORE. Yes, moments in our lives require different reactions but some moments are just what they are. Either a teachable moment or a lesson learned. 

Day to day while running my business, I encounter numerous parents( mainly single moms). As I've accepted that I've been placed in most of their lives as an outlet, I've also accepted that a smile and a gentle chuckle is a definite pick me up for some of these parents. 

We never know what a person is experiencing. Just last week I was a walking sac of tears but the gentle words and support from 2 great people, kept me going. They cracked jokes, shed light and ultimately reminded me that I was better than what I was experiencing at the moment. 

My Lovies, for others to know us and appreciate us, we have to remain truthful to ourselves. My challenge is that you'll be surrounded by amazing people who bring out the silly side of you. Life is more than a serious face and going to work everyday. Life is lessons, honesty and growth.  Chose to smile each day and show up as yourself. Not who others perceive you to be.  And in return, the world will have no choice but to accept who you truly are::: YOU!!

Signed, 

I'm her & Shes Me. 

Simple Reminders..

I'm not perfect but I Love God. I make mistakes, I stumble but I always get back up and try it again.. 

Today is only Monday but my FAITH and PRAYER life have been tested. Sometimes, God will use situations to position us. 

I was positioned yesterday.. I prayed yesterday and I cried yesterday. 

Today I woke up, still feeling God's presence. I was a bit quieter than normal ( wasn't extremely social) and I just spent time listening... 

Then it happened, a sistergirl reached out and the tears fell. It was such an unexpected text but it warned my heart. 

My Lovies, I challenge you to trust the process. Trust change, trust moves, trust tears, trust frustrations because it's the beginning of the making of you. And when you least expect it, God will remind you, "You're right where I would have you to be to Change the World"...

Let your light speak for you, be okay with your mistakes and trust that someone is watching and learning.. 

Signed, 

I've learned A lot but I PRAY more! 

Matters of the heart...

I have this thing called MY Truths.. My Truths are exactly what they are MY truths. It's a mechanism I use to share my innermost secrets and thoughts without caring if I'm judged. 

I've experienced many responses when I share my truths. Sometimes they're well received and sometimes, they are taken in a manner different than how I meant. 

As I'm growing older I'm learning that it's best to voice MY truths or walk around carrying them with me. To this day, there are people who I'll never share my truths with. Not for fear of being judged or misunderstood but that door was never opened or I've never felt comfortable or safe enough to share. 

Maybe it's just me but I believe we encounter people for specific reasons. I no longer beat myself up trying to figure it out, I let the Ahh Haaaa moments take my breathe away or teach me a lesson. When I share my truths, almost NEVER am I looking for receiver to act on it. I just want them to hear me, understand it and feel MY truth. Like it? Totally their choice. Appreciate it? Again, totally their choice. 

My Loves, learn the importance of being honest about how or what you feel. Accept that sometimes people will not understand and it's definitely ok. In time, if it's meant they'll get it. 

I challenge you to 1st be honest with yourself and honesty with everyone else will come easy.. Find a way to voice your truths, you'll feel better about Life. 

Signed, 

I Give You My Truths

Whatever Wednesday....

I've been meaning to blog since Mother's Day. This was the 1st year that I didn't have a melt down. Like so many other holidays, it's become commercialized by the amount of money that's spent. This year, #boychild, #girlchild and #niecechild  really made me smile. I know they are young and money is sometimes hard for them to come by( without me giving it to them) but they made it happen. 

When I woke up Sunday, I was beyond Thankful. I received so many messages, cute gifts and phone calls that it made my heart smile on the inside. Not to mention the release I had at church, the ugly cry at that... Whew!! 

 I'm horrible with wearing my feelings on my sleeve but lately I've had a whatever attitude AND not whatever in a negative way. 

More so, I'm ready to embrace WHATEVER is in store for my life. After a few heartbreaks and setbacks, it's so easy to just live life as a hermit, inside a shell hiding. But I refuse to live that way. Who would it benefit? Certainly not me. 

So here's to Growth, wherever this journey is leading us I'm Ready... 

Motherhood, I Got this and I'm not going to fail NOW. 

To Relationships, if you give I'll give. I'm able, open, willing and ready. 

To Success, it's not stopping with just KISS, whatever is brewing I'm ready to pour.. 

And to life, oh it's been a turbulent ride. Some days high and some days low. But it's definitely made me into the Woman I am today. 

So my lovies, Whatever this Wednesday throws your way, good or bad don't take it laying down. Somethings aren't always a fight. Some are mere gifts that are just God's way of reminding you that it's ok and HE has you.. Live and Let Live. We'll never know until we look whatever the fear is in the face and say, "I'm Not Scared".. No Fear here. 

Signed, 

Living My Life Like its Golden! 

11, eleven, 3lev3n

I have an 11 year old. Where has the time gone? I look at my daughter and I just want her to be a baby again. The little babygirl I carried in the baby b'Jorn, the little girl who gave me strength when I had none. The little girl who was my friend and motivation and didn't even know it. 

My Chelia Ne'Dawn is growing so beautifully. This weekend as I celebrated her little life with some of her friends, I remembered what it felt like to be her age. The laughter, the dancing, lip gloss, boy chatter and crazy music. Yes! I did all of that with MY 11 year old. ( the turn Up was real and I'm still suffering but it's Worth it)

Parenting has its woes: Trust Me. But the milestones outweigh everything else. 

Gosh I love this little girl. As we embark the pre- teen years, I look forward to all it will bring. Tears, Boys calling, disagreements( some followed by YES and NO to) More growth and maturity too. 

I love my Mooda Pie, Li, Girlchild my Ace, my Strength, my Joy.. 

Yes, I Love my daughter. Happy 11th bday Moo!

Signed, 

A Grateful Mommy