But HE knows..

We all need great friends. I always thought men and women could never be friends without sleeping together. When I was younger, if you talked to a guy and he had a girlfriend, you were trying to steal him. If you had a friend who was married, your name came up in an argument because you want him.. The lists go on and on..  

Oh have I proven each one wrong. Some of my best friendships are with men. One of my longest standing friendships is with a guy. One of my first friends when I 1st moved to Boston and lived on Columbia Rd. To this day( and he's married) we're thick as thieves. I give him a woman's perspective when he and the Mrs have a disagreement and he gives me the male perspective when I'm receiving mixed signals from guys I met. 

I'm appreciative to all of my male friendships. I've learned that it's okay to have male friends. Just this week, another close male friend and I discussed boundaries. And whether or not we believe we should have them; boundaries are sometimes needed. They keep you from making choices you'll later regret. 

Not only do our husbands, boyfriends and guy friends need us but to some degree we need them too. 

Aside from my brothers, some of my most sound advice and support, comes from my guy friends. 

True friendships are hard to come by. Especially friendships of the opposite sex. We determine the level of respect and appreciation given in these friendships. I must admit, if you think you may be attracted to a guy friend, do not cross those lines and try and build a relationship. Not that I've ever done it but I'm sure if it doesn't work you can't go back to just kicking it! 

Today, I stand firm in being a confidant, good listener, no crap taker in my guy friendships. Sometimes, the pill is hard to serve when you have to speak harsh truths but if the friendship is true, you get thru it, you grow and remain tight!! 

Shout out to my homies who appreciate the kid.. I appreciate and love y'all too!! 

Signed, 

Simply Thankful for my guy homies!! 

I'm Every Woman...

I've struggled to put this particular blog into words. I went as far as to reach out to one of my writer sistergirls to get her thoughts. I was thinking to do a "Spotlight" then I figured maybe a "Feature". Then it hit me, this is just as much my story as hers because she's my Aunt. One of my mother's closest sisters. 

Meet my Aunt Tric'e, Author of No Longer will I hide the Stranger in my Bed. In this book, she holds back nothing and she's shares intimate parts of her life. 

I remember her wedding like it was yesterday. She married in this huge church and she looked like a Princess. Who knew that night she'd suffer at the hands of her husband. I mainly remember her wedding because I wanted to marry her then husband with a huge wedding in Disney ( I was all of 5 or 6 years old). Growing up, even as a child, their marriages seemed so glamorous. He was an organist and she was a psalmist. They traveled the entire East Coast singing together. 

As years progressed, it all still seemed peachy until she announced to the family what was really happening behind closed doors and filed for divorce( you must purchase her book to get the full 

scoop). I've always believed that in some cases children make it better but in her case, she was barren and that itself caused her to suffer thoughts of never being enough.. 

As I look back on my Aunt's life, I commend her for being as strong as she was. She smiled and lived off $10 and never skipped a beat. She raised her children and never ever lost her Faith. 

So many things go undiscussed because we do not want to be judged. The real test is when you can share your story and help others. Currently, she's preparing her second memoir and celebrating her book being released on Kindle for electronic purchase. 

Stay tuned and keep your eyes open for Patricia Hobbs- Williams. 

My Lovies, abuse of any kind is abuse. While it's mainly women who suffer, I've learned that men are silent sufferers as well. I urge you to never allow yourself to be anyone's punching bag with their words, physical punches or unsolicited sexual abuse. We ARE each other's voices, stories and sisters. We are Everyone! Thank You Aunti, for becoming a voice against abuse. 

Signed, 

Simply Cheneka, the niece of a Survivor 

I'm in Love...

Oh yes I am! In love with the concept of building a life that I love.. 

Took quite a few bumps, detours and start overs but I finally get it, I got it and now I'm good. 

My first shot at being a business owner has been an amazing success. I knew my idea would work but who knew for 4 years my service would remain in demand? I'm forever grateful to my clients and staff for trusting me and riding the waves. 

As 2015 comes to and end, I'm beyond excited for all the new things I'm allowing myself to build upon. When you love someone or something, you'll go to the ends of the earth to make it work. These size 7.5s have taken me far in 2015 and in 2016 we will continue to trod the distance. 

I've found out that waking up happy every single morning sets the tone and the atmosphere for my day. Life is looking up. I'm not only building a life that I love but I'm building a life for my children to love. It's exciting yet scary but I'm

Here for it. 

Love Life: it's going to happen. I believe it, trust it and I'm excited.. 

Physical Life: I'm going to continue working hard at being aware of my body and tuned into my need to be healthy and fit( on my terms). 

Parental Life: I'm looking forward to watching my children grown and become who they are destined to be. 

Spiritual Life: God hasn't left me, he won't leave me and as long as I stay receptive he's going to keep guiding me.. 

Financial Life: the more I invest in MY dreams and MY education, the rewards will be priceless. 

My Lovies, your declarations may be different than mine but if you start making them now and setting your self up for greatness, you will not fail. 

My heart is still full. For once I see everything coming full circle and I'm loving all that I see.. Stay tuned, only up from here!! 

Signed, 

Simply Cheneka