She is Me

She is Me 

And I am Her... 

Life hasn't been easy but she is finding Her way... Not alone

ReDiscovering 

Her passions

What makes her Smile

What makes her sad 

And what it takes to turn a frown upside Down

Understanding that Her life is to short to live Unhappy so She is Living... Not Alone 

She is Finding the Right Words and being in the Right Place for Love.

Because in order to receive She must Give 

And in order to Give She must start with herself.. 

I Love Her,

I Respect Her,

I appreciate her,

I Adore Her, 

She is the apple in my eye,

The beat to my heart. 

She completes Me

Ahhhhhh, the beauty in Accepting Me.

Because I have finally Embraced Me,

I'm Open to Good Love,

The Right Love

His Love...

Not Alone....

Signed,

She is Me

It WON'T Be this way forever...

This morning I woke up in a FUNK...

I mean it was something serious. I spazzed out and before I knew it, I was sitting in the middle of the floor looking at myself in the mirror doing the ugly cry( when I got a real good glimpse I made a mental note to myself, get dressed today girl, NO lounge pants)...They say tears water our souls, well I practically had a flood... I'm sure it was a well overdue cry. You know, we walk around with so much bottled in that when we finally let it out, it's an explosion...

I was a bomb of illegal firecrackers..( yup, just horrible), everything I could think of was running rampant..
                                            "God, why this, God, why that"...

When I finished with all of my questions to God, I heard him say, " Daughter, I'm here... I've never left you and stop letting the cares of the world make you feel less than".. You are more than enough"..

Wow, me? I'm more than enough?
 Sometimes, our insecurities( yes, I admit I have a few) will sometimes get the best of us and before we know it, we're beating ourselves up. I'll be 35 next month. While I've accomplished SOOOO much, there's still so much more I want to do. I'm a stickler for setting a time frame to have things completed in my life and after the birth of my son, it seems that things went in a total different direction.

Am I complaining, No because each task has been good for me. Oh, alot of them hurt but it didn't kill me. Alot left me speechless but I didn't lose my voice. It was in the quiet and stillness of my room that I understood WHY...

We make choices and decisions that sometimes make no sense( except to us) to the people around us. In these 4 years, I've learn the importance of following my own dreams and living my own life. We never depart with what we've been taught but as you live a little and make mistakes along the way; you learn.

I've learned so much about me. As I embrace what 35 will bring me, I'm FEARLESS. For so long I've been so fearful but God's voice reminded me," I took you from a place of comfort to where not a soul but a few cousins and your daughter's extended family knew YOU and  YOU survived".

God, I hear you... But was I reaaaaaally hearing him? Then he reminded me, I took you off a job that did not pay you YOUR worth to being a Business Owner. Not only am I a Business Owner but I'm operating in my call, helping women and children. So many women have come to me broken and together we've found their strength. Now is not the time to buckle CHENEKA( yeah, that's my government name)....

To each of you who will cross this blog today, it's going to be okay. Cry if you must, yell and scream too. Remember, God will still be there and it won't be this way forever. Everyday won't be sunshine and some days won't be as bright as others. The challenge is to get thru it and PRAY.. Praying makes the difference and know OUR FATHER listens and cares.. And when you can't find the words to pray, write them down or ask someone you trust to pray and cover you..( thanks Karm)

I'm not going to lie and say I'm 100% better right now but I'm smiling... I'm loved, appreciated, honored and supported... This to Shall Pass!

Signed,
It won't be this way forever...

There's Always a Reason....

I.
Am.
Alive.

I.
AM.
FREE.


There's always a reason for being. Sometimes it just takes a little living and encounters with life to help you appreciate your call and why you're placed where you are and come across the people you do.

As always, I say to myself, " Expect each day to be different than yesterday and no matter how tired you are SMILE at the clients".  Running a Nanny/Sitter Service is rewarding but it's also pulls at the cords of my heart with some of the families I meet. I treat Each family with respect and the highest level of professionalism. However, as I get to know each family and their situation( if there is one), I tend to look at them in a different light.


I've been contemplating hiring a part-time assistant. Some days are full days and some days are laid back and relaxing. I see the benefits of meeting great families because they quickly refer someone else. In the last 2 months, KISS has picked up 3 new families, with 2 newborns ( possibly) arriving early next year.
The home of our Future KISS site is under construction, so we are in the waiting period. Space is tight but knowing the kids are safe and the parents are happy, I've become okay with the sacrificing of my home.


2 weeks ago, I received an emergency call on my business line. I didn't answer it because it was Sunday, my last sit had left for the evening and I wanted to relax with my little people before we began to prepare for the School/Work Week. After I did not answer, I soon received a text to my personal phone. Upon reading the text, I realized who the family was and I quickly responded. I called back, I could hear the need and seriousness in the Mom's voice. In less than 20 mins, she was at my doorstep filling out KISS paperwork for her daughter and granddaughter to start the following day.

I digress, for the last 3 weeks, Faithfully every morning I'm on the MonFri-JUMPStart prayer& declaration call for Business Owners. Not knowing my participation was releasing blessings for me, I started sharing my experience with other people and they have joined( continue reading, you'll soon see the importance)...

My new client hugged me and said, "Ms.Neka you just don't understand what this means to me. Thank-You for seeing us this late and we will see you tomorrow." She left, and I continued in my Mommy mode with my little people.

That Monday, I woke up at my regular time excited about the JUMPStart call. The declaration for the day 12/2 was FAVOR... See, although this parent called yesterday she was actually scheduled to start KISS services in January of 2014. But, the week before another parent submitted a letter of discharge because her family will be relocating. I'm losing 1 but GOD saw fit and because HIS Favor covers me, I picked up 2 new clients!!!

Later that evening, when "Mom" ( as I address most clients) came to pick up her girls, we were able to talk. She was then able to openly talk to me about the urgency of their services starting earlier than scheduled. I just listened, what broke my heart most was when she shared how she gained custody of her grand-daughter. Her parents are both in jail serving 2 life sentences with 20 years on top of the life sentences. This little chocolate girl is 5 years old and will see her parents for the rest of her life in jail. I tried to wrap my head around not being here for my children and it hurt to bad. My kids are my life, everything I do I do for them. Although I exist as a Woman outside of Motherhood, they consume so much of my time. I sacrifice my weekends for girlchild and her activities, I wrestle with boychild because the Mister is traveling for work ( and to be available for the twins), I spend Saturdays doing cool activities with them, our Sundays are spent worshiping together. They are a big part of who and what I AM...

I'm easily triggered to cry and once "Mom's" eyes began to water I connected with her and an AHA moment took place. AHA, the Grace & Favor that sits upon my life is there to share with others, especially children. And although somedays are tiresome for me and I think to give it all up ( for about 1/2 of a second), I'm quickly reminded that, "There's Always a Reason". When we take ourselves and our needs out of the equation, we can then clearly see the bigger picture!!

As I finish up this blog, I Embrace all that is for Me & My Family. I embrace our story. It's unique and OURS... and although it may not be playing out how I would like, God has it in the order that's right for us to be a testimony to someone else....

"There's ALWAYS a Reason"

Take Care,
NekaT.